Sunday, October 7, 2012

170s are over!

I have officially left the 170s behind, and now weigh 168.2 lbs as of this morning's weigh-in. I am so excited! I seem to have found a balance with my diet, and even exercise, and I'm seeing results!!!

Since January, I'm down 18lbs. That's after 8 months of stalled weight loss, so I'm very pleased to see weight coming off regularly now.

In other news, I may have a second job, I'll find out on the 15th for sure. It will be a huge help to my family, so I'm really hoping I get it!

Things are going quite well at the moment, yay for happy times!

-N.

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Brief Update

I got a job!

Apparently my daughter made such a good impression on the daycare staff at the gym where I work out, that they asked if I wanted a job. I said yes, and now I'm three weeks in already! I love it, especially because I get paid to do what I was doing at home.

I've literally been forcing myself to choke down a salad almost daily. I fucking hate salad. It doesn't matter how I make it, I still end up feeling nauseous while eating it. Lettuce is just so gross. Seriously, I would rather eat worms than salad. But stupid salad is actually working. I've lost 5 lbs since my last doctor's appointment, and by next week I should be into the 160s.

That's pretty exciting. I still would rather eat worms though. 

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Nothing New

It's been two weeks since my doctor's appointment. I've been careful to eat at least two cups of vegetables and fruit daily, and I've been working out more on top of doing more activities on my off days. I've started forcing myself to eat salad again, since my doctor recommended I eat at least one daily.
I got a job at the gym's day care, which is awesome since it will give me my membership and childcare for free.

Despite exercising more, and eating even healthier, and having a decent deficit for calories at the end of the day (Most of the time), I've managed to gain weight again. It's only a pound, but I'm still very agitated by the fact. I spent Friday and Saturday in NY with Beth, and we walked pretty much everywhere (We went to the Met and I finally got to see exhibits I wanted to see), despite the extremely oppressive heat. I made decent food choices, and I still gained.

I also quit the facebook group I had joined for moms trying to lose weight. I found some of the women to be preachy, judgmental, insufferable cunts about EVERYTHING, including what heart rate monitor to buy. Apparently if you don't buy a Polar brand monitor with a chest strap, it's a waste of money *eye roll*. I don't need constant monitoring, I just want to confirm that the machines I'm using are accurate. It was demotivating to read posts there day in and day out. The way I see it, I can find, and have found better women, and men to help support me (Thank you MFP!).

Anyway, I'm tired of thinking about this shit, and I have to get dressed for the gym.
If I don't see any progress in the next couple of weeks I'm going to look elsewhere for help with weight loss.

I'd rather be napping,
-N.


Monday, August 27, 2012

Doctor Follow-Up

So I had my follow-up with my doctor today. She had me keep a food journal, and sent me for blood work.

She tested my cholesterol, my thyroid, my fasting glucose, and a couple of other things.

They all came back pretty much perfect, except my cholesterol, which is slightly elevated for bad, and slightly low for the good.

In the three weeks between visits, I didn't gain or lose any weight. I went back to the gym even harder than before, did as she asked and upped my calories, and tried to eat as healthy as possible.

She says I'm not eating enough fruits and veggies, which I sort of knew. Some days, I just don't get to it.

I also need to cut honey out of my morning tea and replace it with stevia.

But other than that, I'm just...obese.

I also lost my gym partner to grad school, and haven't found a new one, which leaves me less motivated. I hate the judgmental stares (real and imagined) I get from people, and they're certainly easier to ignore when I have someone with me. I'm more self-conscious than I was before.

Most of my workout clothes had to be thrown out because the seams in the thighs burst open from wear. That's definitely an enormous blow to my ego, it's like "Hey fatty fatty, just give up, we can't contain your disgusting cottage cheese thighs with mere cotton thread."

I'm sad, and I want to cry. I still feel like garbage most days, but I push through it and go to the gym even if it's only for half an hour. I ate a klondike bar tonight to make myself feel better.

I am not on the right path.

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Again, far too long between posts.

Boy has my summer been busy! I've gotten back to the gym, and have been working out harder than before.
I finally had my appointment with the doctor yesterday. It went very well, and she spent about an hour with me. We discussed the usual things one would expect from an appointment about weight loss issues.

She's sending me for blood tests to check my thyroid, my fasting glucose levels, and several other things to see if she can determine the problem. She also suggested that because of my level of activity, that I'm not taking in enough calories. She suggested I increase my intake to 1500 calories to see if there's any improvement. She is also having me keep a food diary for two weeks, and I have a follow-up with her in three.

I hope I can get to the bottom of the issue, because I'm still sitting at 176lbs. It's frustrating!

I will post my results from the follow-up when I get them!

-Nicole.

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Memorial Day Weekend

So all of my excitement from my last update was for naught. I was down to 176, and holding when Friday rolled around. I knew that we had several barbeques to attend, so I made sure to mind how much food, and what I took in.
Friday and Saturday we didn't do much. I was ill with stomach issues, so I wound up laying in bed a lot both days. I finally gained my appetite back, and ate a bagel and a plain hamburger on Friday night.
Saturday we ran errands, and while Mike ate at the mall, I ate small meals before and after and sipped iced tea while he had hot dogs.
Sunday was BBQ numero uno, I had a hot dog and hamburger along with some baked beans for lunch. I snacked on Carrots, celery, and cucumber from the crudites plate, but avoided the ranch dressing. I had a couple of peanut butter cookies and an Italian knot over the course of the day as well. That is significantly less than my standard fare at a cookout. I was feeling proud of myself.
Monday was Memorial Day, and I always go to the parade in Trumbull and watch from a family friend's yard. They have a big cookout each year. I had a hamburger, a couple of carrot sticks, and some of the kielbasa I made. I drank water and iced tea. I wasn't hungry, and I felt good about my choices.
Yesterday I took Eisley to the zoo with my mom, we did two laps around the place because Eisley managed to sleep through the first, haha. My mom had a cheeseburger and fries. I shared a popsicle with E, and stole a couple of leftover fries from my mom. I had steak and corn for dinner.

I felt very proud of my choices over the weekend, as they are much improved from how I would normally eat on a holiday weekend.
I stepped on the scale this morning for my weekly weigh-in, and I managed to gain back all 5 pounds I had lost, as well as an additional pound, bringing me back up to 181.

I haven't worked out at all lately, unless you count running around after a toddler for hours on a daily basis, so I know that I haven't been doing myself any favor, but I'm still disappointed.
The only good news is, is that today, for the first time in weeks, I feel normal. I'm not exhausted to the point of being barely able to function. I feel like I could go to the gym, which I may actually do tonight if I still feel up to it.

I really need to call that doctor's office and see if there are any cancellations that have opened spots up so I can get my thyroid checked out sooner.

Well, that's all for the moment.
-Nicole

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Weekend Update

So just a quick little blurb since I haven't been posting much lately. I'm finally into the 170s! I've maintained 176 for over a week now, which is pretty freaking awesome! I have not been to the gym though since the end of April. I just seriously have not been feeling well at all. I blame the weather, because it's been mostly cold and rainy for weeks, although the last three days have been wonderful!

I'm going to try and get back into working out again starting on Monday. I hate having to start over, but at least it's not years between visits this time.

Anyway, I'm going to head to the park in a bit and I've said all I need to say!

-Nicole